365 days.

One year has passed since my father died.

The past year all I have tried to do is keep on living exactly how he would have wanted me to.

Seems like a good path to stay on.

--

Below is the eulogy I wrote for him, and managed to choke out at his funeral. Only now can I go back and read it without sobbing again. It's still heartbreaking to think of his suffering, and all he will miss out on. 

But finally I am reaching a really beautiful stage of grief. Mostly when I think of him I smile. I love to talk about him and remember him. I know you are supposed to "get over it" and I had one person suggest that I'm "just at that age" where parents die. (Really? 38? I dunno any age seems too young), I know it's part of life, and I accept it. 

But still miss him.

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Eulogy.

Before I begin I would like to thank all of you on behalf of my entire family for being here today and for the amount of compassion and sympathy shown to our family over the past week.

For those that do not know – my name is Karen and I am Dan’s oldest (and smartest) daughter.

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My father was my first love. He was my hero, my protector and supporter. I thought he lit the sky.

We all knew him in different ways. But we all have one thing in common – he was one we went to for advice, wisdom – or sometimes he would just say “Don’t worry.”

He truly enjoyed sharing his thoughts and advice.. I know he was a safety net for so many of us. He always knew what to do and was a rock for all of us to lean on. He loved all of us more than he loved himself. There has never been a moment in my life where I have doubted my father’s love and I know that many others are not so lucky. Most people never experience love like he and my mother had.

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Some of his last words of advice to me were “Take care of each other.”  That was my father. Still thinking of others even in his last days.

I always admired the kind of quiet dignity my father had. His stoic nature only amplified his incredibly unique sense of humor. I think we can all relate to my father’s rather dry wit at times. No one was immune from his remarks.

What I experienced last week was enormously profound. He knew what was happening, and even so – and even through a haze of morphine – he was STILL making sarcastic comments. He was still making us all laugh during such a heartbreaking time.

My father literally laughed in the face of death.

They say hearing is the last sense to go, but I am thinking for him it was humor.

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It was a privilege to be by the father’s side during his last moments. He helped bring me into this world, and I was there to help him leave. His death of course broke our hearts, but he also left me with a sense of peace that everything will be ok.

I think we can all agree there will never be another person like my father.

But we can carry on his legacy of kindness and humor.

And we can take care of each other.

Thank you.

If you want to know where I get my twisted, dry sense of humor.
You are lookin at it.

KPG Clinic notes

Kasey teaching a friend of mine on her TB/Connemara gelding

Olympian Kasey Perry Glass was in the area again last weekend. The clinic cost more than my mortgage so obviously I couldn't ride this time, but I did get to audit!

During a short break I talked to Kasey for about 10 minutes. She DID remember me from April and is just the sweetest person possible. I love that she represents USA dressage because I'm not sure you could have a nicer person.

We chatted a bit about what's next for her and her horse Dublet. She might do the World Cup, but is really aiming toward Tokyo 2020. I had to laugh to myself as she was discussing her possible show schedule and how it affects her world ranking.

"Ah yes, Kasey. I def keep my own World Ranking in mind when planning shows."

Sorry for my lack of media

She also had some funny things to say about this years WEG and the whole hurricane situation and the freestyle getting canceled. Basically she said yes the weather was crappy, but they ride in weather like that all the time in FL. However, it seems Charlotte and Carl (yes THAT Charlotte and Carl) LEFT before the final decision was even made regarding the freestyle. So reading between the lines I wondered if that was a big reason it was just canceled.

She was also very sweet and asked about Hampton. I of course proudly explained how we were polishing the 2-tempis and even touching on the 1s. She seemed genuine and was very encouraging. Here we come Tokyo 2020!!! #not

Sadly I had to work that afternoon so only caught about 4 rides. She is a very patient, kind teacher and worked well with both green pairs and more experienced.

Here are my notes:

• Leg on anytime you take with your hands
• in shoulder-in, counterflex if the horse isn't listening to your inside leg. Push shoulders in
• In counter canter, play with change of flexion
• If your horse bobs his head in the canter, push toward the hand and play with the bit
• Transitions within gaits to build strength
• Be able to put the poll wherever you want
• Flying changes: Push off the new inside leg before change
• Do changes on small lines (like a figure 8). It shortens the space you have to collect them
• If they "stop" in their mouth, go forward
• In half pass, anytime they want to slow or disconnect, change to a leg yield, go fwd
• Open inside rein in half pass to help shoulder over
• Shoulder fore to half pass and back to shoulder fore
• Transitions!
• Keep a slight shoulder fore in mediums

2018 You Been Good

Annual torture of the horse. 2018 spoils.
This is the price you pay for having a horse crazy girl love you, Hampton.

I wasn't sure how 2018 would go frankly. Having just lost my dad, I was now without my North Star, my family was reeling with a tremendous loss and I wasn't sure I would be able to navigate.

Horse shows were unknown at the beginning of the year. My dad financially helped me a lot with showing (and Hampton in general). Would I be able to afford a show season without him?

Not only was I able to do this all by myself (money wise) for the first time ever, we had a fantastic season full of firsts, ups, downs, wtfs, personal best scores, antics and hilarious moments.

In case you missed it, here's a round- up of the year. :)

I am lucky enough that a February Masterclass with Charlotte was in Lexington, so I went to audit and write an article about the (pretty damn cool) experience.

In April we enjoy a day of lessons with Olympian and medalist Kasey Perry Glass! What a fun day and I was so happy I could give this to some of my bestest horse friends!

Rode some Icelandic ponies with my friend Steph.

(and she finally bought one of her own!)

I visit the backside of Churchill downs the week of the Derby. 

First show of the season was the KDA Spring Classic at the Kentucky Horse Park.

We did PSG and 4th freestyle. Scores were not awesome, but we did hold our own.

In the midst of all this I GOT MY NEW (free) SADDLE!!!

A Custom Wolfgang Solo

In June we venture up north to Chicago to show at Balmoral Park. LOVED this show, and we earned some of our best scores of the year at PSG! And a reserve high point too!

I start up a scholarship in honor of my dad. The community raised enough

money to fund this for almost 10 years! Holy crap!

In July Hampton comes up lame on the right front. We find navicular changes, inject his coffin joint and give him bar shoes. He appreciates this, and is sound immediately.

In August we hit up Ohio and Majestic Farm. We get decent PSG scores in the 60s,

and a great Freestyle score to qualify us for regionals. Also I slept in my trailer and got rained on.

We have a great time at IDS ride-offs as a prep for Regionals.

Regionals is 4 days of fun, exhaustion, excitement, bucklet list checking off and dumbass moments.

We show PSG in the ROLEX ARENA FOR FUCKS SAKE. Is this real???

We get 8th in a cut throat 4th Level Freestyle Championship (open and AAs)

And I blew the equitation class when I didn't realize there was a pattern.

Still, 3rd is REALLY GOOD.

Add caption

 We get invited to Nationals, so of course I forget I have bills to pay and go ahead and enter. Good thing because we end up 9th in the AA 4th level freestyle championship. And I get a SMASHING deal on these boots:

And here we are in December!

We've been working on basics. Like staying straight in The Chute of Death. And transitions.

Hoping December stays pretty quiet and boring.

What a year, eh?

Thank you all for all of your support.

No Ceiling

Superb side-eye there Hampton

Ssshhh don't tell anyone but I actually love this time of year.

I know the weather is going to shit, and things freeze and barn work gets really inconvenient, but it's this time of year - when the shows are over, and the pressure is off - when you can really start to play and experiment with dressage.

The other day, I was working on staying straight for tempi changes inside a chute we had set up in the arena. Shockingly, making your horse straight creates more jump in the canter and before I knew it, I had Hampton firing off the ground. No one was around watching so I thought ... I wonder what would happen if I tried a 1-tempi change?

It's not perfect, and I want to crap my pants when I think about having to do 15 of these in a row. But you have to start somewhere! 

(He does change on my aids, and clean and straight which is about as good as you can ask for for a first try! But you can see he gets croup high in the second change, which will mess us up when we try to do more. But for now. I'll take it!)

(slow mo, so you can see the change instead of just legs everywhere)

I also think it's probably in my best interest to get very solid in the 2s before really starting to learn the 1s. Just because our M.O. is that wheels fall off the bus for a while when learning something new. But I did want to let Hampton know that yes, this is now in the List of Things Human Might Ask For.

Slowing getting the front to come up.

So I challenge my blogger friends - challenge yourself! Try something you think is above your level.

Post your results!

 (Ok maybe don't gallop Rolex size fences tho).